Parenting blows...

I have a few friends that are at different stages in their lives and for various reasons, childless. I have one in paticular that fights an inner battle with herself as though having children is what classifies people as having worth. I call "bullshit" on that theroy.

First and foremost, I am 38 years old. The mere thought of just starting to have children now is hair raising and a theme of many unsettling nightmares I have.

Really.

When I hit the ripe old age of 44 my little beautiful children will ALL BE OUT of the coop….or at least legal to kick out… Either way, my parenting time in the sun is complete.

I think there is some insane bullshit pressure that we put on ourselves about having kids. Like it is the frosting on our life cake or something. People that you don’t know very well will have huge amounts of audacity when it comes to busting your balls about not having them…..like somehow you are a freak or missing out on something.

Here is the thing…..those people have kids - after all, misery loves company.

Having children is rewarding and yes, you do love them a lot - but I am not sure that it is the essence to life or necessary to feel fulfilled. There are tons of things in my life I will never get the pleasure of doing that could come close. That doesn’t make ME a freak. That bullshit only comes from not having kids.

The big, fat, nasty little joke that no one ever talks about? Having kids sucks ass most of the time.

No....It really, really does.

Yes…I get to have sacred love (but, it is conditional….any parent telling you different is lying thru their teeth), and I get to have pride and joy. One of those is a sin.

So what does that leave? I get to have deep seeded love and joy? Ok….well…that’s it.

The cost of that deep seeded love is: strife, depression, anger, resentment, hurt feelings, distrust, worry (like you have never experienced before), shock, horror, disappointment, bitterness and failure. You get ALL of that more than you do anything else and that is if they are normal functioning children. Throw in a dash of screw up and you have a whole other ballpark.

I love my dog Ripley almost as much. I do not love my other dog like that, but I sure do love Ripley. So….it is possible to get close to it with other things.

I know, I know….I make is sound horrid…..well, it is. It is hard and thankless and at the end of it all, they leave your house and forget you ever put yourself through all of it anyways.

"Shame on you MichChick! Being a parent is beautiful and fullfilling and what life is meant to be!"

Wrong.

That is your idea of what your life should be either because you have chosen that path or because you think you should. That does not negate the wonderful life that any individual could or does have sans any offspring.

Each individual has the right to choose thier life path. With or without children. All I am merely pointing out is the hidden truth that no one ever seems to want to talk about.

Look, being a parent...no wait...scratch THAT. Being a good parent is hard ass work. Really hard. Being great is subjective and I have no idea what goes into that, so I will not even try.

For those of you whom have chosen to forgo the childbearing part of life? Enjoy sleeping in on Saturday. Don't let anybody make you feel guilty about it either.

MichChick